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What’s Left

It’s come to my attention recently that, as a side effect of my life going the way it has over the past couple of years, I almost completely gave up regular practice of anything spiritual.  It wasn’t intentional, though I always kind of assumed those things I did with even small amounts of regularity were kind of unnecessary.  I liked them but I didn’t need them, per se.  After all, I was still writing, still thinking, just not doing very much.  I hadn’t worked on stuff in the lab for a long time, no personal ritual, not even solstice spa days.  Other things got in the way.

Interestingly enough, part of my writing and such from a few years back had led me to the conclusion that anyone seeking a path or trying to find their place in the vast landscape of spirituality should first strip away as much of their prior spiritual practices and activities as possible to see what their life is like without it.  Doing that lets you see what purpose it served, what need it fills, and where you actually have more power or ability than you previously thought.

So, the last year or two has been an unintentional experiment to verify that theory.

In the end, I found myself disconnected.  Others had to draw my attention to things I might have otherwise noticed myself.  I found myself talking about things I believed, but not quite being able to commit to in action.  I was reflexively dismissing the importance or even proper existence of energies and things I used to work with on a regular basis.  I had meditated sporadically, but mostly like one would do a homework assignment, not with any specific personal purpose.  And over time I became mostly numb and blind to things I used to feel connection to.

So, you know, turns out that whole spiritual practice thing is important.  And you have to do it, not just talk and blog about it.

If you believe things, you have to act on those things.  Otherwise you stop actively caring about them.  The trick is to make sure the things you’re actively caring about and acting on are worthwhile and healthy.

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